20 Mar Doesn’t he get jealous?
Posted
in Industry Knowledge
Throughout my time in the industry, I have been asked countless times whether my husband has an issue with my “Hobby”. Doesn’t he get jealous? Does he get upset? The list of questions does not end. The short answer is no! He does not care, mind, get jealous or otherwise. This may be difficult for some to understand, which is, of course, understandable. Every relationship has its own unique brand of feelings. The hard truth is that not every relationship can stand the test of time, and even fewer can stand up to jealousy knocking on the door. It takes a very strong and special relationship to be open to the task of NSFW content creation, especially if only one person is participating. Every relationship is different. Ours is not perfect by any means. However, we do have an extreme amount of trust in one another and are both very comfortable in all aspects of our relationship. He respects the fact that I have so much fun in my own corner of the internet, as does he (not NSFW, but other ventures). For me, specifically, I am very fortunate that he not only understands but encourages my fun time. Playing from the comfort and safety of my own home and on my own terms has proven many times to be a fantastic, stress-relieving hobby that I have no plan on abandoning.
I also encounter many who believe that the nature of the content I make is influenced by what I do in my own bedroom. The truth of the matter is some of it is, and some of it is not. It is as simple as that. Having been in this relationship for a decade (longer than I have been in the industry), we have checked off so many bedroom boxes that just about nothing surprises us anymore. That being said, several points carry over, but many of the “topics” I cover as a creator are simply part of my imagination – no, I will not be specifying which ones that take the mystery and fun out of it! I will also add that being in the industry has, in fact, added some extra fun that we may never have explored otherwise, simply because we didn’t really know about it. The world of NSFW content creation can open your eyes to a whole new world of naughty, and it’s fun here!
"THE HARD TRUTH IS THAT NOT EVERY RELATIONSHIP CAN STAND THE TEST OF TIME, AND EVEN FEWER CAN STAND UP TO JEALOUSY KNOCKING ON THE DOOR. IT TAKES A VERY STRONG AND SPECIAL RELATIONSHIP TO BE OPEN TO THE TASK OF NSFW CONTENT CREATION, ESPECIALLY IF IT IS ONLY ONE PERSON PARTICIPATING."
I have many friends in the industry who have struggled with jealous partners from time to time. Although I can understand why, I cannot understand how the concept of all this seems to escape them. This is also very easy for me to say, having been in the industry for as long as I have. I’ve heard, “He thinks I am going to leave him for one of my members“, “He doesn’t want anyone else to see me naked”, “She thinks it’s shallow, clickbait for cheap thrills”, etc. I can understand not wanting to share your partner with the world. It is not for everybody. I will, however, say that a lot of people also find it super hot knowing their partner’s sexual side is not only alive and well, but also they are the one who gets to enjoy and explore it in person! Many people tend to forget that with this particular industry, you are only sharing virtually and that just because you have a member who is extremely interested in your content, that doesn’t mean you will take off to be with them. Again, it takes a certain level of trust and security to be able to truly not be jealous in this situation. This confidence does not stem simply from telling them it’s harmless fun but rather from a good foundation in your relationship, to begin with and grow from there.
The last major point I think it is important to make here in order to avoid any potential jealousy or distaste from your partner when you do what we do is not to lie about your relationship status. I have seen models and creators do this for assorted reasons time and time again. I am not saying you can not have your privacy because you can! I mean that pretending to be single in order to attract more viewers is not only ineffective in the long run but can also really put a damper on your relationship if it’s something you keep up for a long time. They may feel that their role in your life is less than it is, they may feel left out and so on. Your brand and creative hobby can, of course, be yours and yours alone. But pretending to be single has split up more couples and upset a lot of members over the years. Nothing throws a wrench into your cam career like being “Single” for 3 years and giving members false hope on purpose (you all know what I am talking about, don’t do this!), and it comes out that you have actually been married for 5 years. I have seen it happen more times than you would think. If you want to keep your private life private, that’s great!
A simple “That is my business” will protect that but also not catch you off guard in a big old lie later on. I could speak on this topic all day long, but at the end of the day, every relationship is different. If you feel your partner may be feeling off about your time in front of the camera, ask them about it! Communication is key for so many reasons in a healthy relationship, and this is no exception! Hear them out and have that conversation. This conversation is also essential to have when you are just starting out, regardless of who sparked the idea of exploring your fun side for the world to see. It can be awkward to start, but you will be glad you did.
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Throughout my time in the industry, I have been asked countless times whether my husband has an issue with my “Hobby”. Doesn’t he get jealous? Does he get upset? The list of questions does not end. The short answer is no! He does not care, mind, get jealous or otherwise. This may be difficult for some to understand, which is, of course, understandable. Every relationship has its own unique brand of feelings. The hard truth is that not every relationship can stand the test of time, and even fewer can stand up to jealousy knocking on the door. It takes a very strong and special relationship to be open to the task of NSFW content creation, especially if only one person is participating. Every relationship is different. Ours is not perfect by any means. However, we do have an extreme amount of trust in one another and are both very comfortable in all aspects of our relationship. He respects the fact that I have so much fun in my own corner of the internet, as does he (not NSFW, but other ventures). For me, specifically, I am very fortunate that he not only understands but encourages my fun time. Playing from the comfort and safety of my own home and on my own terms has proven many times to be a fantastic, stress-relieving hobby that I have no plan on abandoning.
I also encounter many who believe that the nature of the content I make is influenced by what I do in my own bedroom. The truth of the matter is some of it is, and some of it is not. It is as simple as that. Having been in this relationship for a decade (longer than I have been in the industry), we have checked off so many bedroom boxes that just about nothing surprises us anymore. That being said, several points carry over, but many of the “topics” I cover as a creator are simply part of my imagination – no, I will not be specifying which ones that take the mystery and fun out of it! I will also add that being in the industry has, in fact, added some extra fun that we may never have explored otherwise, simply because we didn’t really know about it. The world of NSFW content creation can open your eyes to a whole new world of naughty, and it’s fun here!
"THE HARD TRUTH IS THAT NOT EVERY RELATIONSHIP CAN STAND THE TEST OF TIME, AND EVEN FEWER CAN STAND UP TO JEALOUSY KNOCKING ON THE DOOR. IT TAKES A VERY STRONG AND SPECIAL RELATIONSHIP TO BE OPEN TO THE TASK OF NSFW CONTENT CREATION, ESPECIALLY IF IT IS ONLY ONE PERSON PARTICIPATING."
I have many friends in the industry who have struggled with jealous partners from time to time. Although I can understand why, I cannot understand how the concept of all this seems to escape them. This is also very easy for me to say, having been in the industry for as long as I have. I’ve heard, “He thinks I am going to leave him for one of my members“, “He doesn’t want anyone else to see me naked”, “She thinks it’s shallow, clickbait for cheap thrills”, etc. I can understand not wanting to share your partner with the world. It is not for everybody. I will, however, say that a lot of people also find it super hot knowing their partner’s sexual side is not only alive and well, but also they are the one who gets to enjoy and explore it in person! Many people tend to forget that with this particular industry, you are only sharing virtually and that just because you have a member who is extremely interested in your content, that doesn’t mean you will take off to be with them. Again, it takes a certain level of trust and security to be able to truly not be jealous in this situation. This confidence does not stem simply from telling them it’s harmless fun but rather from a good foundation in your relationship, to begin with and grow from there.
The last major point I think it is important to make here in order to avoid any potential jealousy or distaste from your partner when you do what we do is not to lie about your relationship status. I have seen models and creators do this for assorted reasons time and time again. I am not saying you can not have your privacy because you can! I mean that pretending to be single in order to attract more viewers is not only ineffective in the long run but can also really put a damper on your relationship if it’s something you keep up for a long time. They may feel that their role in your life is less than it is, they may feel left out and so on. Your brand and creative hobby can, of course, be yours and yours alone. But pretending to be single has split up more couples and upset a lot of members over the years. Nothing throws a wrench into your cam career like being “Single” for 3 years and giving members false hope on purpose (you all know what I am talking about, don’t do this!), and it comes out that you have actually been married for 5 years. I have seen it happen more times than you would think. If you want to keep your private life private, that’s great!
A simple “That is my business” will protect that but also not catch you off guard in a big old lie later on. I could speak on this topic all day long, but at the end of the day, every relationship is different. If you feel your partner may be feeling off about your time in front of the camera, ask them about it! Communication is key for so many reasons in a healthy relationship, and this is no exception! Hear them out and have that conversation. This conversation is also essential to have when you are just starting out, regardless of who sparked the idea of exploring your fun side for the world to see. It can be awkward to start, but you will be glad you did.
