19 Jan Psychology of Kink – Fetishsexuality and Sexual Authenticity
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in Marketing Yourself
In this series on the psychology of kink, we have been exploring what kinks are and how they develop. The goal of these pieces is to help understand other people’s sexual interests that we may not share, as well as challenge what we see as “normal sex”. In previous pieces in this series, I have talked about how there is no consensus amongst experts on what is normal, abnormal, or deviant sexual practices, but why do people feel like there are things that can be put into these baskets? And why do some people have very strong opinions on how these practices should be categorised? In this piece, I will talk about the theory of Galen Fous, who developed concepts called fetishsexuality and the Personal Erotic Myth. These concepts attempt to explain the strong reactions people have to sexual experiences and desires, and provide insight into how we can move towards improving sexual authenticity in our own lives.
CARL JUNG AND UNCONSCIOUS SEXUAL DESIRES
Before we start with the theory of Galen Fous, we need to go back to Carl Jung. Carl Jung was a Swiss psychiatrist and psychotherapist who was around at the same time as Sigmund Freud. While Freud is well known for his theories around sexuality, Jung also contributed a great deal to this area, particularly how sexuality functions in the unconscious. Some of his ideas are clearly outdated (he was someone who treated homosexuality as an abnormal sexual behaviour), but his work around how we develop and express our identities still holds true today. I have talked in previous pieces about the idea of sexual drives being unconscious, and Jung was a fierce advocate for making these unconscious drives conscious, as he felt this would make us happier and more well-adjusted.
You may know Jung for his theory of archetypes and their influence on human motivation. According to Jung, twelve universal archetypes are present in the “collective unconscious” of all humans. Jung coined the term “collective unconscious” and developed this concept, which explained why there are certain themes and symbols that appear with us from birth and appear in all cultures across the world and through time. He argued that there is a system of themes and symbols that represent the human experiences we have (such as belongingness, love, death, and fear), and this is identical in all human beings. The themes and symbols in this system are represented by archetypes, which are the foundations that we build our lives upon. According to Jung, our motivations are driven by the dominant archetype of our personalities, and we all tend to have one that is in the driver’s seat.
Jung believed that sexual drives and desires formed a large part of our unconscious minds; the similar themes and barriers we face when we try to confront sexuality could be explained through it being a part of his theory of the “collective unconscious.” We tend to be resistant to being sexually honest, and rather than this being an effect of our social environment, Jung’s theory suggests this could be part of a collective “shadow” that humans try to retreat from.
GALEN FOCUS, FETISHSEXUALITY AND THE PERSONAL EROTIC MYTH
Galen Fous is an author and psychotherapist from the US who works with clients who have an interest in BDSM/kink and wish to come to terms with these identities, which can potentially cause them a significant amount of distress. He developed the concept of “fetishsexuality”, which combines examination of an individual’s sexual identity with the psychological concepts developed by Jung, including the collective unconscious and archetypes. “Fetishsexuality” is an authentic sexual identity and orientation, where the individual is driven to orgasm or other deep erotic states through an innate, inherent, and lifelong desire to connect with a range of archetypes that represent power exchanges. Fous argues that these power exchange archetypes are linked in pairs, with some typical examples being Dom or Domme/sub, Master or Mistress/slave, and predator/prey. According to Fous, these pairings are key to kinky identities, and like Jung, he says they are deeply embedded in our unconscious, and that by exploring them we are connecting to “human psychic software” which is ancient and integral to human experience. Likewise, he argues that denying the exploration of these sexual desires, which are truly authentic and common to humans, results in dysfunctions that are incorrectly labelled as sex or porn addictions. Jung also argued that denying the desires that reside in our unconscious can lead to mental health issues, and that overcoming the human fear of judgment and shame from our community or peers is key to an overall happier and more well-adjusted life.
Fous developed a concept called the Personal Erotic Myth (PEM) that he believes each person has that drives what they are interested in sexually and what leads to deep erotic states. Everyone’s PEM is unique to them; however, they all link back to this idea of the “collective unconscious” and the symbols and archetypes that it contains. Once a person understands their PEM, they can accept their sexual desires as normal and learn to integrate them into their everyday life… leading to a happier and more well-adjusted life, free from pressure to hide their sexual desires from themselves and others.
While this may sound like psychological ramblings that are out of reach for most laypeople, the ideas are interesting and help us think about why people may react so intensely to certain kinks… either in positive and negative ways! The idea of symbols and mythic figures floating around our unconscious minds and impacting how we operate day to day is present in a lot of concepts and theories across a range of research disciplines. Although difficult to prove and verify, they give us an interesting perspective from which to view our sexual desires and how to explore them in way that is healthy and authentic.
Rem Sequence is an Australian adult content creator, blogger, and internationally published alt model. She has a background in psychology, philosophy and political science and worked in health and sex education, youth work and trauma counselling for almost two decades. Now, she works full time in the adult industry, as well as indulging her passion for arts, writing and music in numerous side projects.
In this series on the psychology of kink, we have been exploring what kinks are and how they develop. The goal of these pieces is to help understand other people’s sexual interests that we may not share, as well as challenge what we see as “normal sex”. In previous pieces in this series, I have talked about how there is no consensus amongst experts on what is normal, abnormal, or deviant sexual practices, but why do people feel like there are things that can be put into these baskets? And why do some people have very strong opinions on how these practices should be categorised? In this piece, I will talk about the theory of Galen Fous, who developed concepts called fetishsexuality and the Personal Erotic Myth. These concepts attempt to explain the strong reactions people have to sexual experiences and desires, and provide insight into how we can move towards improving sexual authenticity in our own lives.
CARL JUNG AND UNCONSCIOUS SEXUAL DESIRES
Before we start with the theory of Galen Fous, we need to go back to Carl Jung. Carl Jung was a Swiss psychiatrist and psychotherapist who was around at the same time as Sigmund Freud. While Freud is well known for his theories around sexuality, Jung also contributed a great deal to this area, particularly how sexuality functions in the unconscious. Some of his ideas are clearly outdated (he was someone who treated homosexuality as an abnormal sexual behaviour), but his work around how we develop and express our identities still holds true today. I have talked in previous pieces about the idea of sexual drives being unconscious, and Jung was a fierce advocate for making these unconscious drives conscious, as he felt this would make us happier and more well-adjusted.
You may know Jung for his theory of archetypes and their influence on human motivation. According to Jung, twelve universal archetypes are present in the “collective unconscious” of all humans. Jung coined the term “collective unconscious” and developed this concept, which explained why there are certain themes and symbols that appear with us from birth and appear in all cultures across the world and through time. He argued that there is a system of themes and symbols that represent the human experiences we have (such as belongingness, love, death, and fear), and this is identical in all human beings. The themes and symbols in this system are represented by archetypes, which are the foundations that we build our lives upon. According to Jung, our motivations are driven by the dominant archetype of our personalities, and we all tend to have one that is in the driver’s seat.
Jung believed that sexual drives and desires formed a large part of our unconscious minds; the similar themes and barriers we face when we try to confront sexuality could be explained through it being a part of his theory of the “collective unconscious.” We tend to be resistant to being sexually honest, and rather than this being an effect of our social environment, Jung’s theory suggests this could be part of a collective “shadow” that humans try to retreat from.
GALEN FOCUS, FETISHSEXUALITY AND THE PERSONAL EROTIC MYTH
Galen Fous is an author and psychotherapist from the US who works with clients who have an interest in BDSM/kink and wish to come to terms with these identities, which can potentially cause them a significant amount of distress. He developed the concept of “fetishsexuality”, which combines examination of an individual’s sexual identity with the psychological concepts developed by Jung, including the collective unconscious and archetypes. “Fetishsexuality” is an authentic sexual identity and orientation, where the individual is driven to orgasm or other deep erotic states through an innate, inherent, and lifelong desire to connect with a range of archetypes that represent power exchanges. Fous argues that these power exchange archetypes are linked in pairs, with some typical examples being Dom or Domme/sub, Master or Mistress/slave, and predator/prey. According to Fous, these pairings are key to kinky identities, and like Jung, he says they are deeply embedded in our unconscious, and that by exploring them we are connecting to “human psychic software” which is ancient and integral to human experience. Likewise, he argues that denying the exploration of these sexual desires, which are truly authentic and common to humans, results in dysfunctions that are incorrectly labelled as sex or porn addictions. Jung also argued that denying the desires that reside in our unconscious can lead to mental health issues, and that overcoming the human fear of judgment and shame from our community or peers is key to an overall happier and more well-adjusted life.
Fous developed a concept called the Personal Erotic Myth (PEM) that he believes each person has that drives what they are interested in sexually and what leads to deep erotic states. Everyone’s PEM is unique to them; however, they all link back to this idea of the “collective unconscious” and the symbols and archetypes that it contains. Once a person understands their PEM, they can accept their sexual desires as normal and learn to integrate them into their everyday life… leading to a happier and more well-adjusted life, free from pressure to hide their sexual desires from themselves and others.
While this may sound like psychological ramblings that are out of reach for most laypeople, the ideas are interesting and help us think about why people may react so intensely to certain kinks… either in positive and negative ways! The idea of symbols and mythic figures floating around our unconscious minds and impacting how we operate day to day is present in a lot of concepts and theories across a range of research disciplines. Although difficult to prove and verify, they give us an interesting perspective from which to view our sexual desires and how to explore them in way that is healthy and authentic.
Rem Sequence is an Australian adult content creator, blogger, and internationally published alt model. She has a background in psychology, philosophy and political science and worked in health and sex education, youth work and trauma counselling for almost two decades. Now, she works full time in the adult industry, as well as indulging her passion for arts, writing and music in numerous side projects.
