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Ten golden rules for fans and consumers

 

You may be aware that I recently wrote a blog post about 10 golden rules for content creators and models. Buyers, consumers, clients, friends, and supporters, I have some rules for you that will make engaging with adult content even more satisfying!

1. MODELS ARE WORKING

We don’t like to state the obvious, but we are running businesses here, and although we may enjoy what we do, we are still working. By engaging too much with people who don’t pay, we are wasting time that could be better spent with paying clients. Imagine running a coffee shop and spending most of your days chatting with people who pop in while the line of paying customers grows and then dwindles as people get sick of waiting. If you are enjoying a model’s content, the best way you can show them that you appreciate them is to pay them. $5 can actually mean the difference between us cashing out for the month or not. Most platforms have a minimum amount that we have to reach before we can get paid, and it can be so frustrating to be a couple of bucks off. Can’t pay? Then, you need to show your appreciation in other ways and make way for the people who have cash.

2. RESPECT BOUNDARIES

Our boundaries have been created for a reason: fundamentally, to keep ourselves safe. If you challenge the boundaries of a model, you are telling them that you don’t care about them. Even if this is not what you consciously think, it is how it will be interpreted, and it will create serious issues. Respecting the boundaries of people in the adult industry is even more important than in other occupations because the hazards associated with it, due to stigma, discrimination and ignorance, are huge. It is literally an issue of safety and could mean the difference between life and death in certain situations.

3. RESPECT PRIVACY

Privacy in the adult industry is so important, as breaches in our privacy can lead to serious real-world consequences. I would not invade the privacy of one of my customers (finding out their real name, where they live, where they work, or their marital status). Similarly, you should not delve unnecessarily into the private life of models. Remember that you are purchasing a service or content, not complete access to the life of the model. Do not take our responses to invasive questions personally; the fact is that we need to tread very carefully in all domains of our lives.

4. PROVIDE FEEDBACK

Quite often, content creators exist in a cone of silence when it comes to our work. People will purchase content or a service and never say anything about it. We may never find out if they loved it or hated it. I personally love reviews, even if they are not 5 stars, because constructive criticism helps me develop my content in a way that people like. Make sure you give feedback like you would for any goods or services: good, bad, or whatever. It is honestly so important.

5. COMMUNICATE CLEARLY

Approach the purchase of adult content and services as you would any other purchase. Abusing the seller, making them feel uncomfortable, emotionally manipulating or not being direct and succinct is not how anyone does in any business transaction. Furthermore, if you want to develop an ongoing business relationship with someone (that is, buy content or services on a long-term basis), it is important to communicate clearly. It doesn’t matter what industry you are spending your money in, the same basic behavioural standards apply.

6. UNDERSTAND THE INDUSTRY

Nobody expects you to be an expert in the adult industry, but asking dumb questions of content creators and adult service providers is not a smart move. It doesn’t take much effort to learn about the business, how the adult industry works and find information about your favourite creators. This information includes where you can buy their content, what payment methods they prefer and how services are provided. It not only makes it easier for us, but it also makes it easier for you, and in the end, this will result in a much more enjoyable experience.

7. COMPLY WITH REASONABLE REQUESTS

There is no need to start an argument with a model or a provider if they are making reasonable requests. The kind of requests I am talking about are payment before product, their preferred payment method and times/method of delivering content/service. It is a waste of time and energy to debate someone’s business with them. If you are not comfortable with their requests, move along and avoid making a big deal of it.

8. DON’T BE A TIMEWASTER

Timewasters are the bane of the adult models’ existence. They are everywhere and threaten to derail us at any time. Please understand that our time equals money, so wasting it is extremely disrespectful. If you waste a model’s time, it will not be quickly forgotten and it will taint any interaction you have with them thereafter. If in doubt about whether you have wasted someone’s time, send a tip.

9. THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK

We understand that when purchasing or viewing our content and speaking to us you are in a certain… state of mind. We also know this means that sometimes you may speak without putting your thoughts together in a coherent manner. But please, to get what we both need from our interaction, stop and take a minute to put your thoughts together.

10. BE A GOOD HUMAN

Remember that you are speaking to a human with wants, needs and feelings. There is a real person at the other end of your transaction who deals with some pretty rough behaviour most days. Do you want to stand out and be remembered in a positive way? Do you want to have nice future interactions with us? Then, be thoughtful and considerate. It will pay off in the long run.

 

Rem Sequence is an Australian adult content creator, blogger and internationally published alt model. She has a background in psychology, philosophy and political science and has worked in health and sex education, youth work and trauma counseling for almost two decades.

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